She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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