So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
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i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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