Dual....:-)
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Text me some of your sweat
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
