I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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