He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
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I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
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I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
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