don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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