It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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