Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
