She announced her abortion via fbk
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
