Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize