i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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