So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
