Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
