Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
