i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
