South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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