He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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