Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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