Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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