well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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