five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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