I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize