did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Randomize
