you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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