just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
