His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
