it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
she looked like the before picture.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
