I am puke
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
