We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
im holly from the hills drunk
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
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i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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