so that wasnt chicken after all
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
