Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
