I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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