Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
