dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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