My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
