Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
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