Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
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I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
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He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
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