One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
