Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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