haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize