I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
