I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
