So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
