Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
