wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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