I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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