My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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