Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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