In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
