I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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