12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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